Monday, April 13, 2009

P.D.A: Public Display of Affection - From "Oh how romantic" to "Holy Cow, isn’t that illegal in this state!?"

Imagine your grandmother stumbling across a couple displaying their affection publicly, as in swapping body heat and making saliva donations to one another like their lives depended on it… would your grandmother a) sigh wistfully and say Oh how romantic, b) cry indecent exposure at the top of her lungs before finding the nearest policeman, or c) join the party? If your answer is C, please do not post a comment explaining why.

If someone were to ask me “how do I know when it’s too much affection”? Well, if the scenario is easily confused with rape… that could be a telling sign. Or if the couple seems to have converted to cannibalism, turning viciously on each other like hungry prey… well, I’d say save yourself. I’m willing to admit that there is nothing wrong with wanting to have an open relationship with the one you’re with. And there is nothing but the law stopping you from committing whichever public acts you wish to. But there’s just something not quite right about people wanting to make their very own rated R film in the public eye. Besides, Moms and Dads everywhere are going to have a lot of explaining to do if their kids see such a proud yet inappropriate display of affection by others.

So here are some more hints that things have gone from sweet or cute, to “time for you two to get a room”:
- If you witness a willing victim getting a tonsil-inspection by a second participant’s tongue, even though he/she is clearly unlicensed.
- If you can’t tell whether it is two separate people who happen to be REALLY close together, or just one person.
- If your eyes roll out of your head or if you go instantly blind because a pair of shameless exhibitionists decided to play Swallow Your Partner in public.
- If you suddenly wonder if there is such a thing as P.D.A Extreme Challenge

By: V.S (inspired by Prof.essa.T)

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